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7 Tips to Stop Comparing Yourself To Others

comparing comparison Mar 21, 2022

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7 Tips to Stop Comparing Yourself to Others

Has anyone ever compared themselves to somebody else? We're all guilty of it, right? Okay. So how do we stop? I have seven steps for you today on how to stop comparing yourself to others.

1 - the most overused word of the century, is gratitude. I know it sounds boring. Everyone's talking about it, but we have to start here. When you are grateful for what you have, when you think about all the things that you are lucky to have in your life, the people that you have in your life, when you can focus and come from a place of gratitude, it will stop you comparing yourself to other people. If you're happy with what you've got, why would you need to compare?

2 - do not compare your life with somebody else's highlight reel. We see all the best bits of everybody else's life and we even hear it from our friends, from our family. People love telling you about the good stuff that's going on. When they've got a promotion, when their boyfriend's done something nice. So do not compare yourself to someone's highlight reel.

3 - Focus on your qualities. Now, this is something that we do not do enough of. What are you good at? What have you been told you're good at? I want you to write this down. It's going to be difficult for some people. It might be challenging, but I want you to write down, what am I good at? What are my talents? When you can write them down and see them, then you can start to focus on them and stop comparing yourself to other people because you'll start to see the places that you flourish in, that you're good at, the reason that you're here, your values and focus on your own talents, your own qualities.

4- Compete with yourself. Let me say that again. Compete with yourself, not others. You're not trying to be a better version of somebody else. You're trying to be a better version of yourself. How can you be a better version of somebody else when we're all so different? You can't compare apples to oranges. Your friend, your boyfriend, your colleague, whoever it is, you can't compare yourself to them. You've had completely different lives, upbringings, traumas, experiences. You have wandered through this life in a completely different way. How can you physically compare yourself to somebody who's had a completely different life? I have twins. They're being looked after exactly this same way. I can't compare them. They're completely different. 

5 - How can we compare ourselves? I want you to just let that sink in for a minute. When you've thought about comparing yourself to others, "She looks better than me." "She has a better social media following than me." Or, "He can run faster than I can." Everybody is going through life at different paces. We've started from different places and we are moving at different paces. I'm going to say that one again. How can you compare yourself with somebody else when they've started at a different place and they're moving at a different pace?

6 - Cleanse your social media. If it is not serving you, you need to go through that, mute a few people. If you are looking at people and they are bringing up feelings of comparisonitis, that is a word, I think, then you need to mute them. If you are watching something and it's causing negative emotions, why are you watching it? Get rid. I've muted a lot of people. Love and respect a lot of people, but some things don't serve me. So I don't want to see it.

7 - Is an interesting one. My last point to help you stop comparing yourself to others is I want you to use jealousy as a guide. Sometimes we see jealousy as something really negative and sometimes it can be quite destructive, but it can also be helpful at times. What are you jealous of? But the more important question, why? Why are you jealous of that person? Is it because it is something that you really want and it's lacking in your life and maybe it's an area you need to explore?

When it's something really specific, it's often a guide of something that we want or we need in our lives that is lacking, and we've not really done anything about it. When we're jealous of somebody as a whole, that's normally a reflection of how we feel about ourselves. But when we're jealous about a specific point, it's often a guide of something that we might need. So explore the jealousy. Again, you can write this down. What am I jealous of? Why am I jealous of? And what have I learned from that jealousy?

I hope these seven points have helped you today. For more information, you can check out my blog at www.alicerickard.com. And for more journal prompts, go check out www.thejournalworkout.com. Have a great day.

 

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